How many times have you heard turns of phrase that suggest womanhood/femininity has a negative connotation? Ever been told you do something "like a girl" in that condescending tone? Ever heard a friend stress that their little boy plays with dolls/paints his nails/likes dresses? Ever wonder why the worst thing you can call a guy is a "p*ssy" and the worst thing you can call a girl is a "c*nt"?
Everybody go read this on Feministing.com.
This is a link on how a bunch of Kurd men dressed in women's clothing and accompanied their photos with messages of pride and respect for women. When I first heard about this, I just smiled a lot - I found it lovely and heartwarming and something to be very happy about. I'm still happy about it and I would love to thank these fellas myself. However, now, I'm really sitting down to think about what they're really addressing.
Why the ever-loving hell is it, the world over, somehow shameful to be feminine? Why is it a cardinal sin to be like a woman? Why is it, in some cases, a capital offense to BE a woman?
Then I thought about my friends who crossplay. I thought, first, about my friend Y. [Name redacted] I have known Y. for years through our mutual convention-going habit. For the first many, many times I saw Y., I did not know Y's born gender. I didn't care, frankly - that's just my friend Y. and that's all there is to it. What was under Y's dresses had absolutely no bearing on Y. being my friend! Y's cosplays were fantastic! Showed a great deal of skill and dedication to the cosplay habit! It wasn't until I was at a convention with my now-ex-boyfriend that I heard comments. The comments my thankfully-now-ex made were homophobic, transphobic, and misogynistic. I'm not repeating them hear, because no one I know needs MORE reason to go whomp that guy.
I have another acquaintance - I'll call this one E. I happen to know that E. is biologically female. For as long as I have known E. she has cosplayed male characters. She and I are not close enough for me to know if she has ever received criticism for cosplaying male characters. From other biological females I know who cosplay males, I haven't heard of much flack of that nature. Heck, since most anime men are designed with the intent of satisfying a female audience, they're PRETTY! There are many characters that look equally good when portrayed in flesh by males or females. Correct me if I'm wrong, but there is much less stigma on F2M cosplay than M2F.
It's not just my friend Y. that I have heard catch a hard time. Men who crossplay as women are often assumed to be gay, and the assumption is made with a negative connotation. You know what? I'm not okay with that. I'm female. I think it's pretty awesome. Clothes marketed/designed for biological females are fun! Skirts and dresses are comfy and come in all kinds of pretty colors! I'm perfectly fine with anyone who wants to wear them doing just that!
Cosplay is about way more than clothes, though. Cosplay, for many, many of us is about the characters. You watch a series and, more often than not, the character you want to cosplay is one who SPEAKS to you. For example, I cosplay Tomo Takino from Azumanga Daioh - I have since I was eighteen years old! When I watched that series, I (and most of my friends) immediately saw an overwhelming similarity to my sixteen-year-old self in the character. Tomo is biologically female, like me. In Rurouni Kenshin, the character of Misao Makimachi spoke to me almost more than any other character has ever done. I've cosplayed her since I was sixteen! But imagine if Kenshin had been the one... And imagine if Misao had spoken to Y.
Why would it be okay for me to cosplay Kenshin but not okay for Y. to cosplay Misao?
Oh right... Because in this world, the worst thing you can possibly be is a woman. I'm really fucking offended by that, just so everybody knows. I hate it that you call a guy weak by calling him a "p*ssy." I hate it just as much that you say a girl has a bad personality by calling her a "c*nt." Both of those imply that lady-parts are something bad. FUCK THAT!
I'm just one cosplayer, one blogger, and one feminist, but here is my affirmation to you:
COSPLAY WHOEVER YOU WANT.
It doesn't matter if you look like them in body type, race, or secondary sex characteristics. Make that costume. Commission or buy bits if you need to! WEAR that cosplay! LOVE that character! Go all the way to replicate their personality!
NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO GIVE YOU SHIT ABOUT IT.
If they do, call them out on their bullshit. If you're a guy cosplaying a girl and someone gives you shit, call them out. Tell them that their comments are bigoted. If you're a girl cosplaying a guy and someone says something, you tell them they're full of shit! Tell them you don't appreciate them bringing their crap into a safe space! I'm not going to tell you don't let them affect you. It's okay if something hurts. That's called being human - we have feelings and they get hurt when people are mean to us. TELL people that their comments are hurtful. You've got the right not to be harassed.
Think about these Kurd men. If they can do what they did, where they are, what business do we have using femininity to shame? I'm not ashamed to be a woman. I'm not ashamed to have feminine traits, nor am I ashamed to have masculine characteristics. Polarization and emphasis of differences, to me, are not constructive or productive. Let's look more at what makes us PEOPLE. Yes, there are differences, but I keep saying, instead of assigning value judgments, let's celebrate!
Marigold, psyched for the Georgia Renaissance Festival this weekend, wishing you love!
No comments:
Post a Comment